Thoughts.

A New Day

I believe everything happens for a reason. People change so that you can learn to let go, things go wrong so you can appreciate them when they go right, you believe lies so you eventually learn to trust no one but yourself, and sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together.

Grace filled Tragedy

The last 20 years have brought me many things.

Perspective.

Maturity.

Growth.

Adoration.

Humility.

Belief.

Wisdom.

Thankfulness.

These 20 years have been very difficult for me.

Learning how to walk.

Training myself to write.

Reteaching my brain how to coerce with others.

Keeping my emotions intact during my ups and downs.

But throughout these 20 years I have earned 

Grace.

Patience.

Gratefulness.

Friendship.

So I guess troubling times can turn into a blessing.

I never asked for this long, difficult walk.

I don't think that anyone ever really does.

I'm appreciative of my supportive family.

My wonderful Friends

Anyone that has helped me throughout these last 20 years.

I know it's been a long time

but I feel like August 8, 1991

was just like yesterday.

Thankful.

Blessed.

Wanting more.

 

Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

I know that things are broken
I know there’s too many words left unsaid
You say you have spoken, like the coward I am, I hang my head
You lay careless, your head on my chest
And don’t even look at me looking my best

And all these things I can’t describe, you would rather I didn’t try
But please, don’t cry you liar
Oh please, don’t cry you liar
Oh please, don’t cry you liar
Oh please, don’t cry you liar
Oh please, don’t cry you liar
Oh this love I have found, I detest

I'm really torn lately.....

Are we to love the sinner but hate the sin?

 The longer we are together
the larger death grows around us.
How many we know by now
who are dead! We, who were young,
now count the cost of having been.
And yet as we know the dead
we grow familiar with the world.
We, who were young and loved each other
ignorantly, now come to know
each other in love, married
by what we have done, as much
as by what we intend. Our hair
turns white with our ripening
as though to fly away in some
coming wind, bearing the seed
of what we know. It was bitter to learn
that we come to death as we come
to love, bitter to face
the just and solving welcome
that death prepares. But that is bitter
only to the ignorant, who pray
it will not happen. Having come
the bitter way to better prayer, we have
the sweetness of ripening. How sweet
to know you by the signs of this world!

Wendell Berry

My Secret

Now - here is my secret:

I tell it to you with an openness of heart that I doubt I shall ever achieve again, so I pray that you are in a quiet room as you hear these words. My secret is that I need God - that I am sick and can no longer make it alone. I need God to help me give, because I no longer seem capable of giving; to help me be kind, as I no longer seem capable of kindness; to help me love, as I seem beyond being able to love.

— Douglas Coupland

My first 36" by 48"

Better pictures to come once dry.