Hiatus

To quit or not to quit......

that is the question.

This blog has gotten me through some of the toughest times

in my life. I've been able to lay out some thoughts and I'm glad that I pushed myself to do so. I've had a chance to display some of my paintings and discover some hidden poetry within my soul. I 

must say that this blog has gotten me through some really hard times. For some it may seem like constant babbling; however I see it as a place to showcase, describe or even repent about some of the crazy things that have happened in my life. This decision will be thought out over the next few days, but as for now I'm still on the fence. When I started this I always told myself if I am going to have difficulty writing blogs. Well I have hit a block. Things are a bit better in my life and I have you to thank for it. Here's to the next three days of thought.

Fallen

Smiles

When I hear her voice.

After I read a thoughtful text.

When she spoils me with her cooking.

After she updates me on the Philly score.

When she reads her Bible with me.

After we exit from a long shift at work.

When we take a walk with her daughter.

After the Buffalo Wild Wings encounter.

When she brings my students individual goody bags.

After a late night phone call clinging to keep one eyelid open.

When I brush the butterflies out of my stomach.

After I let go of her hand as I finish our prayer.

When I kiss her on the cheek.

After every smirk, wink and giggle.

She makes my heart Smile.

Thought #1

For every chemical
You trade a piece of your soul
With no return
And who you think you know
Doesn't know you at all
Their drain is needless
Someday we'll wave hello
And wish we'd never waved goodbye
To this romance
We'll drink up every line
And shoot up every word
Till there's no more
Crashing down
Crashing down my friends
Only love
Only love can win
So cry these tears we'll cry as all
We've held so long to fall apart
As the curtain falls we bid you all goodnight

She.....

 She stood there and she was beautiful. Her face was full of worry, confusion, anger and she was upset. She stood there and i stood across from her, looking at her, unable to take my eyes off of her. While i was full of regret, she was lost in her own train of thought. Someone had to make her think though. Silence filled the air for longer then i realized at the time. She looked up but quickly away, avoiding my eyes that were visibly begging for hers, and in that instant her tears played tag along her cheeks, dripping aimlessly down to the floor, giving into gravity. But she was beautiful. Biting her lip out of shame for crying, she looked back down and in that instant, defeat took over her every inch. I stood there, my eyes still begging for hers, and I couldn't move. She was beautiful and I was numb. To check if I was alive, i took a step towards her, being drawn in by her beauty, then i took a few more, until i found myself quickly wrap my arms around her. She went to turn away cause she didn't find herself deserving of this, but i held her, deserving or not. I held her because i wasn't going anywhere, anytime soon and i didn't want to let her slip away from me like i did the rest, because She wasn't the rest, she was her and she was absolutely beautiful where she stood. I didn't let her go because, I couldn't, i wouldn't let myself. Her being there, within my arms, was my realization, the kind that's just a whisper in your ear. I pulled away and wiped away her tears. Finally, her eyes met mine. It was then that we both knew. She was everything. She was my beautiful girl and she is beautiful where she stands.

I was as you could say.........

Inspired

Free Painting

I need motivation for a painting. 

Actually, I have a ton of motivation and

thoughts for my next Canvas, just no takers as of yet. 

If you would like a canvas made by yours truly

including all of the love that goes into one, please

let me know and I'll get started working on it right away.

This offer doesn't come around too often and I'd like

it to go to someone who would enjoy it as much as 

I like making it.

Plagiarism 101

I have to admit...

I am a plagiarizer at heart. Here's my secret. 

I like to visit other blogs and sometimes steal 

their secrets (and pictures). 
Case in point 
Good But Hard. This is my

 sister Susannah's blog. She started her blog when

her daughter was born with profound hearing loss and

also while our family was going through the loss of

a loved one. I look to her from time to time

to inspire me on ideas on what to write about. As you 

can tell, lately the posts have been lackluster.
The holidays are coming up and I can't wait to spend it 
with my family. I hope to hang out for a good few days
with them and catch up on life. Its not that often that
I get an entire week off of school. Maybe it will start
a fire inside this tiresome mind of mine and give me ideas
in which I can inspire others. Work is tedious, yet it gives
me an outlet to look forward to tomorrow with a dime 
in my pocket and a smile on my face. Sometimes a few smiles.
By the way, my niece Monrovia is jetting through her years
too quickly. She is already like 6 in her pictures. Crazy